How do you manage stress? Learn how stress works in the body, its symptoms, techniques you can apply in daily life and what therapy can contribute.
Do you wake up to the alarm in the morning and check the notifications on your phone, get stuck in traffic on the way, rush between tasks that need finishing at work, and come home in the evening to bills and housework? By the end of the day your body is tired but your mind is still running, and falling asleep may be difficult. Stress has become an almost unavoidable part of modern life. However, getting rid of stress completely is neither possible nor necessary; what matters is how we cope with it. Stress management is the set of skills used to recognise sources of stress, regulate the body's stress response and stay flexible in the face of difficulties. In this article we explain how stress works in the body, which signs need attention, and science-based techniques you can start using in daily life straight away, step by step.
What Is Stress? How Does It Work in the Body and Mind?
Stress is a physical and mental reaction that arises when a person perceives a situation as more demanding or threatening than they can cope with. The key word here is "perception". The same situation, for example speaking in front of a large audience, may be an exciting opportunity for one person and a great threat for another.
When the brain perceives a source of stress, two basic systems come into play:
- The fast alarm system: Within seconds, adrenaline is released. The heart speeds up, breathing quickens, muscles tense and attention narrows. The body prepares for action.
- The slow, longer-lasting system: Cortisol is released via the axis between the hypothalamus, the pituitary and the adrenal glands. Cortisol reorganises the body's energy to cope with the stress.
These systems are extremely useful for short-lived threats. They improve our performance during an exam, a job interview or a sudden danger. In psychology this is also called "good stress" (eustress). The problem begins when stress becomes chronic, that is, when the alarm system never switches off. When the body stays on guard for a long time it grows tired, and this tiredness leads to both physical and mental symptoms.
What really determines stress: the balance of demands and resources
A model often used in stress research explains stress as the result of two appraisals. First the person asks: "Is this situation a threat to me?" Then they ask the second question: "Do I have the resources to cope with it?" Resources cover many things, such as time, money, knowledge, skills and social support. When perceived demands exceed perceived resources, stress rises. This model teaches us something important: stress management is not only "calming down", but also reducing demands and increasing resources.
What Are the Symptoms of Stress?
Chronic stress shows itself in different ways in different people. The signs below do not mean a diagnosis on their own, but they may show that your body and mind are trying to tell you something.
Physical symptoms
- Headaches, neck and back pain, jaw clenching
- Stomach complaints, indigestion, changes in bowel habits
- Sleep problems, waking unrested in the morning
- Falling ill often, constant tiredness
- Palpitations, a feeling of breathlessness
Emotional and mental symptoms
- Irritability, impatience, getting angry quickly
- Difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness
- Constant worry, the mind not "switching off"
- Feeling overwhelmed, a sense that everything is piling up
- Withdrawing from things you used to enjoy
Behavioural symptoms
- Changes in eating habits
- Increased smoking, alcohol or caffeine consumption
- Withdrawing from social relationships
- Procrastination, being unable to get things done
- Increased time spent on screens
If you would like to understand more closely how physical symptoms relate to stress, you can take a look at our article on psychosomatic symptoms.
Sources of Stress Today in Turkey
Stress has existed in every era, but in recent years the sources of stress for many people living in Turkey have both multiplied and become lasting.
Economic uncertainty: The cost of living, rent increases, salaries not lasting to the end of the month and being unable to plan for the future are among the most common sources of chronic stress. Economic stress is especially wearing because it is hard to control.
Collective trauma and disaster anxiety: The 6 February 2023 earthquakes deeply affected not only those living in the region but people all over the country. For many people living in cities at risk of earthquakes, safety worry has become a constant background element of everyday stress.
Digital load: The expectation of being constantly online, work messages spilling over after working hours, notifications constantly splitting attention and the uninterrupted flow of bad news make it harder for the brain to rest.
Artificial intelligence and transformation in the world of work: In many sectors, uncertainty about how artificial intelligence will change jobs creates a new source of worry, especially among white-collar workers and young people.
Big-city life and migration: Long commutes, crowds, noise and living far from extended-family support reduce social resources while increasing the load.
Work stress that cannot be managed for a long time can turn into more serious conditions such as burnout syndrome.
Stress Management Techniques: A Step-by-Step Guide
Effective stress management is made up less of a single technique than of small, sustainable changes in several different areas. We cover the techniques below in three groups: calming the body, regulating the mind and restructuring life.
Techniques that calm the body
1. Box breathing: Breathe in for four seconds, hold for four, breathe out for four, wait for four. Repeat this cycle four or five times. Box breathing can bring a quick calm, especially before an intense meeting or after a tense phone call.
2. The physiological sigh: Take a breath in through your nose, then immediately add a second short sniff on top; then breathe out long and slowly through your mouth. This simple technique can help ease tension within a few repetitions and can be used unnoticed during the day.
3. Progressive muscle relaxation: Starting from your feet, tense each muscle group for five seconds, then release for ten. Continue with the calves, thighs, abdomen, hands, arms, shoulders and facial muscles. This exercise lets you notice the difference between tension and looseness and is especially useful before sleep.
4. Movement: Regular physical activity helps balance stress hormones. You don't have to go to the gym; a brisk 20 to 30 minute walk a day, taking the stairs or a few stretches at home can be effective too.
Techniques that regulate the mind
5. The circle of control: Draw two circles, one inside the other, on a sheet of paper. In the inner circle write the things you can control (what you eat, when you go to bed, who you ask for help, your news consumption), and in the outer circle the things you cannot control (inflation, other people's behaviour, the weather). Then consciously direct your energy to the inner circle. This exercise is especially useful for sources of stress that are largely outside our control, such as economic stress.
6. Worry time: Set aside a 15 to 20 minute "worry time" during the day. When worries come up during the day, note them down and say, "I'll think about this at 6 p.m." At the set time, look at your notes and ask of each worry, "Is there anything concrete I can do about this?" If there is, decide on a small step; if not, try to accept the worry and let it go.
7. Thought record: After a stressful moment, write down: What was the situation? What went through my mind? What did I feel? What is the evidence for and against this thought? What could be a more balanced perspective? For example, the thought "I'm going to ruin this presentation and get fired" can be balanced with "I'm prepared; even if I make a mistake, that doesn't mean I'll be fired".
8. Coming back to the present moment (5-4-3-2-1): When your mind drifts to the future or the past, notice five things you can see around you, four things you can touch, three sounds you can hear, two things you can smell and one thing you can taste. This exercise brings your attention back to your body and surroundings and slows the spiral of thoughts.
Steps that restructure life
9. Setting boundaries: Setting a time after which you don't reply to work messages, being able to say "no" to people who make excessive demands, and setting aside time for yourself are among the most effective stress management steps in the long term.
10. Digital hygiene: Reduce notifications, and try spending the first half hour after waking and the last hour before bed without your phone. Follow the news once or twice a day, at set times.
11. Sleep routine: Going to bed and getting up at the same time every day directly affects your capacity to cope with stress. A tired brain may see even the smallest source of stress as a great threat.
12. Social support: Staying in regular contact with people you trust is one of the strongest buffers against stress. Even a ten-minute chat with a friend can lighten your load.
Managing stress is not about stopping the storm; it is about learning not to let go of the helm during it.
Why does starting small matter?
Trying to fit all these techniques into your life at once can itself become a source of stress. Instead, this week choose just one physical and one mental technique. Practise them at the same time every day, for example after your morning coffee or before brushing your teeth in the evening. Attaching a new habit to an existing one makes it easier to make it stick.
Say someone who works at a bank and has two children notices that they pass their tension on to the children every evening when they get home. This week they try just two things: after parking the car, before going inside, they do two minutes of box breathing in the car, and after dinner they put their phone in a drawer for an hour. By the end of the week they still feel tired but notice there are fewer arguments in the evenings. Small but regular steps often work better than big, short-lived decisions.
When Should You Seek Professional Support?
It can be helpful to speak with a mental health professional in the following situations:
- If stress has clearly disrupted your sleep, appetite and daily functioning for weeks
- If the methods you have tried on your own are not enough
- If you constantly feel exhausted, hopeless or low
- If you are having panic attacks or episodes of intense anxiety
- If you increasingly turn to alcohol, cigarettes or other substances to cope with stress
- If serious problems are emerging in your work, family or relationships
If you have thoughts of harming yourself, this is an emergency; call 112 (emergency services) without delay. If symptoms are at a level that needs medication, an evaluation by a psychiatrist is important. Individual therapy can be carried out face to face or online.
How Is Stress Management Addressed in Therapy?
In therapy, stress management begins with building a personal roadmap. Everyone's sources of stress, reactions and resources are different; so instead of a one-size-fits-all solution, a plan suited to the person's life is developed.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): The thought patterns that increase stress, for example catastrophising, perfectionism and the belief "I have to sort everything out myself", are examined. Problem-solving skills, time management, relaxation techniques and assertiveness work are learned in sessions and tried out in daily life.
Work on psychological resilience: Resilience does not mean never being affected by difficulties, but being able to recover after being affected. In therapy, the person's strengths, sources of support and how they have coped with difficulties in the past are explored. The relationship between early maladaptive schemas and psychological resilience and coping with stress is one of the important topics emphasised in clinical psychology.
A schema-focused view: Beneath a person always reacting to stress in the same way there may be beliefs formed early on, such as "I'm not good enough" or "Other people's needs matter more than mine". Noticing these beliefs makes it easier to change automatic reactions to stress.
Mindfulness-based approaches: Skills of focusing on the present moment, taking distance from thoughts and accepting difficult emotions can help reduce the intensity of the stress response.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the most effective method for stress management?
There is no single method that works for everyone. Using techniques that calm the body (breathing, movement, sleep), techniques that regulate the mind (thought record, circle of control) and steps that change the way you live (setting boundaries, social support) together generally gives more lasting results.
Does stress make you put on weight?
In some people chronic stress can increase appetite and, in particular, the desire for high-calorie foods; in others it can decrease appetite. Disrupted sleep and reduced movement can also contribute to weight change. For marked changes in eating behaviour it is important to consult a doctor.
How long does stress have to last to be harmful?
Short-term stress is natural and often useful. Stress that lasts for weeks or months, does not go away with rest and clearly affects daily life needs attention for both physical and mental health.
Do children experience stress too?
Yes. Children can experience stress in situations such as exam periods, tension at home, changing schools or friendship problems. In children, stress often shows itself through signs such as stomach aches, sleep problems, restlessness or withdrawal.
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Eda Erkan Alapala
Klinik Psikolog. İstanbul Kent Üniversitesi Klinik Psikoloji Tezli Yüksek Lisans mezunu; bilişsel davranışçı terapi, çocuk merkezli oyun terapisi ve çocuk-ergen psikoterapisi alanlarında eğitimlerini tamamlamıştır.
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