How does impostor syndrome combine with life abroad? Learn why expats feel inadequate and like frauds, the warning signs and practical ways to cope.
When the acceptance letter arrived, or when you signed the job offer, you may have been delighted. But in your first days in the new country, a doubt crept in: "They chose me by mistake. One day everyone will realise I am not actually this good." You stayed silent in the meeting, because what if what you had to say was wrong? Even after a successful presentation, you thought, "That was just luck." In psychology, this feeling is known as the impostor phenomenon, or impostor syndrome. It is not an official diagnosis, but it describes an experience shared by many accomplished people: feeling inadequate and "fake". Impostor syndrome abroad can grow even stronger when it meets a new language, an unfamiliar workplace culture and the pressure to prove yourself. In this article, we look at how this feeling shows up in life abroad, what causes it and how to cope with it.
What Is Impostor Syndrome, and How Is It Experienced Abroad?
Impostor syndrome is when a person attributes their achievements not to their own abilities and effort but to luck, timing, other people's mistakes or outside factors, and fears being "found out" one day. From the outside, these people are usually competent and successful. Inside, however, they carry a constant sense of inadequacy and a fear of being caught.
Abroad, this experience gains additional layers. The experience you built up over years in Turkey may be seen as less valuable in the new country because it is not "local experience". Your degree may still be waiting to go through an equivalence process. Perhaps you do not yet know the words in the new language to express your profession fully. While trying to learn the rules, abbreviations, jokes and ways of working that everyone else knows naturally, you may feel constantly one step behind.
Students, academics, engineers, healthcare workers and managers often describe this feeling. Thoughts such as "Everyone here is smarter than me", "I was only hired to fill a quota" or "I was good in Turkey but I'm ordinary here" are the typical inner voices of impostor syndrome abroad.
Imagine a doctoral student in Canada who receives positive feedback on her project from her supervisor. But when she gets home that evening, she does not feel relieved; instead she thinks, "My supervisor is being kind. He actually knows my work is weak." The following week, she stays quiet in the lab meeting even though she has an idea, because she fears that if she says something wrong, her "real level" will be exposed. Months later, a colleague voices the same idea and is praised for it. This time the student is angry with herself: "Why didn't I say it?" This cycle shows that the feeling of being a fraud does not remain just a feeling; it also shapes a person's behaviour and opportunities.
Symptoms and Signs of Feeling Like a Fraud
If you recognise several of the following thoughts and behaviours, you may be experiencing this:
- Feeling uncomfortable when you are praised, playing down a compliment or brushing it off.
- Attributing your achievements to luck, to having had help or to "an easy task".
- Being excessively afraid of making mistakes and experiencing small errors as disasters.
- Over-preparing before a task, or on the contrary, putting it off out of fear.
- Not sharing your ideas in meetings and avoiding asking questions.
- Constantly comparing yourself with local colleagues or with other successful migrants.
- Hesitating to apply for new opportunities, promotions or projects.
- A brief sense of relief after a success, followed by the worry that "I'll be found out next time".
- Fatigue and burnout, because you are constantly trying to prove yourself.
These signs on their own do not indicate a mental disorder. But when they continue for a long time, they can lay the ground for anxiety, burnout and low mood.
Why Does Impostor Syndrome Grow Stronger Abroad?
Language and Accent
However well you speak a language, it may not feel like your mother tongue. When your accent is noticed, when you mispronounce a word or when you miss a joke, the feeling of "I don't belong here" can be triggered. Yet language skill and professional competence are different things. Struggling to express an idea in a foreign language does not mean that the idea is worthless.
Not Knowing the Local Codes
Every workplace culture has unwritten rules: how much people speak in meetings, how you disagree with a manager, how formal emails should be, how much it is appropriate to talk about your own achievements. The codes you are used to in Turkey may be different here. This uncertainty feeds the feeling that "Everyone knows, and I'm the only one who doesn't".
Cultural Messages: Modesty and Not Standing Out
In Turkish culture, modesty is a valued trait. For someone who grew up with messages such as "Don't praise yourself", "Don't draw attention" and "Beware the evil eye", owning their success can be hard. In some workplace cultures, however, you are expected to express yourself and make your achievements visible. A person caught between these two messages may find it hard to admit their success, both to others and to themselves.
Expectations from Family and Those Around You
The sentence "They went abroad, they're very successful" can be as heavy as it is flattering. When family and friends in Turkey see you as a "success story" while you feel that you are struggling inside, this contradiction can deepen the feeling of being a fraud.
Being a Minority
Being the only Turk, the only migrant or the only woman in a setting can make a person feel like a permanent "representative". The fear that every mistake will be attributed not to your own personality but to an entire group increases the pressure to perform.
Early Beliefs
Growing up with conditional love, constant criticism or very high expectations can turn into the belief "I'm not good enough" in adulthood. The new challenges that come with life abroad can revive these old beliefs.
Feeling like a fake does not mean you are one; more often it shows that you are genuinely attempting something new and difficult.
Effects on Family, Relationships and Career
The feeling of being a fraud does not stay at work. Someone who spends all day trying to prove themselves comes home tired and tense. They may have less energy to give to their partner or children. Some people even hide their struggles from their partners, thinking, "I made the decision to emigrate, so I can't complain now."
In career terms, impostor feelings can cause missed opportunities. Not applying for a promotion, not making demands in a salary negotiation, refusing to speak at a conference or avoiding taking on a project can prevent a person from reaching their real potential.
A similar picture can appear in friendships. A person who feels like a fake may avoid talking about their profession or their life with people they have just met, wondering, "What will I say if they ask more questions?" This slows down the development of new bonds, which are already hard to form when living far from home, and can increase feelings of loneliness.
There is also an important effect on parents. Children observe how their parents talk about themselves. A parent who says "I'm not good at these things anyway" may, without realising it, pass a similar message to their child. For children growing up abroad to be at peace with their own bicultural identity, a self-compassionate approach from their parents sets a powerful example.
Practical Steps for Coping with Impostor Syndrome
Create an Evidence File
Start a notebook or a digital folder. Write down the positive feedback you receive, the projects you complete, the new skills you learn and the challenges you overcome. When the feeling of being a fraud arrives, looking at this file helps you remember that the feeling does not reflect reality.
Name the Feeling
Saying "I am experiencing impostor feelings right now" instead of "I am truly inadequate" puts some distance between you and the thought. Naming a feeling makes it harder for it to run you.
Balance How You Assess Success and Mistakes
When something goes well, write down at least three things that were your contribution: your preparation, your knowledge, your effort. When you make a mistake, ask, "How much of this was about me, and how much was about the circumstances?" In this way you can balance the tendency to credit successes to outside factors and blame mistakes on yourself.
Adopt a Learner's Identity
If you are working in a new country in a new language, it is natural to be in a learning process. Saying "I'm learning and growing" instead of "I should know everything" is a more realistic attitude both towards yourself and towards others. In most workplace cultures, asking questions is seen as a sign of interest and responsibility.
Run Small Risk Experiments
Set small goals, such as asking one question or sharing one idea in a meeting each week. Afterwards, note what happened. Most of the time you will see that the disaster you feared did not take place. Over time, these experiences strengthen your confidence.
Find a Mentor and a Community
Migrant professionals who have been down similar paths before you, mentoring programmes and professional networks are valuable sources of support. Hearing that others experience similar feelings reminds you that you are not alone.
Make Your Comparisons Realistic
The person you compare yourself with may have been born in that country, been educated in that language and known that system for years. You, on the other hand, have moved your entire life from one country to another. Comparing yourself not with them but with who you were a year ago offers a fairer assessment.
Try Sharing Your Achievements
It is possible to stay modest while making your achievements visible. Saying "I led this part of the project" or "Here is what I did to reach this result" is not boasting; it is giving information. Try saying such sentences first with a trusted friend or your partner. In time, you will be able to express your own contribution more comfortably at work too.
We cover the subject of confidence abroad in more detail in our article on confidence while living abroad.
When Should You Seek Professional Support?
Impostor feelings appear from time to time in many people. However, getting support from a professional can be helpful in the following situations:
- The feeling of being a fraud is clearly limiting your career decisions.
- You are experiencing constant anxiety, tension or panic-attack-like symptoms.
- Signs of burnout have appeared because of overworking.
- You have felt worthless, hopeless or deeply unhappy for a long time.
- Problems with sleep, appetite or concentration are making your life difficult.
If you have thoughts of hopelessness or of harming yourself, please do not wait; call the emergency number of the country where you are: 112 in EU countries, 911 in the US and Canada, 999 or 112 in the UK, and 000 in Australia. Online therapy is not an emergency response service; in such situations, local emergency services and local psychiatric services are essential.
University student counselling centres, workplace employee assistance programmes and the mental health services in the country where you live are also important resources. Support in your mother tongue does not replace these; it can be used alongside them.
How Does Online Therapy in Your Mother Tongue Work?
The feeling of being a fraud is often at its deepest when it is thought in your mother tongue: "Who am I to...?", "What will people say?", "I don't deserve this." Talking through these inner voices with someone who knows their cultural roots, and in the same language, can help you notice them more quickly. After a day spent trying to prove yourself in a foreign language, being able to think freely in your own language during the therapy hour can be a breathing space in its own right. For general information aimed at people living abroad, see our page for Turks living abroad.
Work based on cognitive behavioural therapy usually includes the following elements:
- Noticing thought patterns: Patterns such as discounting success, catastrophising and "all-or-nothing" thinking are identified.
- Examining the evidence: The evidence for and against the thought "I am inadequate" is weighed up together.
- Working with core beliefs: The origins and present-day impact of deep beliefs such as "I'm only worthy if I'm perfect" are explored; where needed, a schema-focused perspective can also be used.
- Behavioural experiments: Feared situations such as sharing an idea, asking for help or making a mistake are tried step by step.
- Self-compassion: We work on learning to treat yourself as you would treat a friend who is struggling.
For online sessions, a quiet and private setting, a secure internet connection and headphones are recommended. A suitable time can be arranged with the time difference in mind. Payments can be made online; pricing in Turkish lira (TL) and payment by international card are possible. You will need to check the insurance terms in your country of residence regarding reimbursement. For detailed information, see the online therapy page.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is impostor syndrome an illness?
No, impostor syndrome is not an official diagnosis. It is a pattern of thought and feeling that successful people often experience. However, when it appears together with anxiety, burnout or depression, professional support can be helpful.
Is this feeling more common abroad?
It is not possible to give an exact rate. However, factors such as a new language, a different workplace culture and the pressure to prove yourself can trigger this feeling in the experience of impostor syndrome abroad.
Will this feeling go away if I improve my language?
Improving your language skills can support your confidence, but the feeling of being a fraud is not only about language. You also need to work on how you evaluate success and on your beliefs about yourself.
Why do I feel inadequate even though I am successful?
Because this feeling is fed not by real success but by the way you interpret success. When you attribute success to luck and mistakes to yourself, the feeling of inadequacy can continue however successful you are.
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Eda Erkan Alapala
Klinik Psikolog. İstanbul Kent Üniversitesi Klinik Psikoloji Tezli Yüksek Lisans mezunu; bilişsel davranışçı terapi, çocuk merkezli oyun terapisi ve çocuk-ergen psikoterapisi alanlarında eğitimlerini tamamlamıştır.
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