Is Self-Therapy Possible? Books, Apps, Methods and Their Limits

Is self-therapy possible? Learn where books, apps and methods such as thought records can help, where their limits lie and when it is time to see a specialist.

You may have spent half an hour in the self-help section of a bookshop, downloaded three different meditation apps onto your phone, or watched "how to get rid of anxiety" videos one after another at midnight. Perhaps therapy fees are stretching your budget, perhaps there is no psychologist you can reach in the district where you live, or perhaps you think, "I can sort this out on my own." This is why the idea of self-therapy appeals to so many people. But is it really possible? The short answer is this: learning and applying some of the tools of therapy on your own is possible and often useful; but therapy itself, that is, the healing relationship built with another human being, cannot be fully replaced by a book or an app. In this article we look at what you can do on your own, what you need to watch out for, and at what point it would be wiser to turn to a specialist.

Is Self-Therapy Possible?

To answer this question honestly, we first need to look at what the word "therapy" covers. In psychotherapy, two things work together: on one side, evidence-based techniques, that is, learnable methods such as questioning thoughts, approaching avoided situations step by step and gaining relaxation skills; on the other, a relationship with a person who listens to you without judging, gently shows you your blind spots and stands beside you in difficult moments.

A significant proportion of the techniques can be learnt on your own. Research shows that, particularly for mild to moderate anxiety and low mood, self-help books and programmes based on cognitive behavioural principles can benefit some people. These programmes are generally more effective when delivered as "guided self-help", in which a specialist provides guidance through brief sessions along the way.

The relationship dimension, however, cannot be built on your own. Looking at your own thoughts from the outside, noticing your own defences and being able to say out loud, in front of someone else, a shame you have carried for years are among the most transformative moments of therapy. For this reason, "self-help work" is a more realistic term than self-therapy.

Who is self-therapy more suitable for?

Working on your own is a more suitable option for people whose symptoms are mild or moderate, who largely keep functioning in daily life and who want to focus on a specific problem. In situations such as tension that rises during exam periods, the stress of adjusting to a new job, a lack of motivation that has lasted for some time or anxiety about public speaking, structured exercises can make a difference. People who like reading and writing, are willing to observe themselves and can work regularly tend to benefit more from this method. By contrast, in situations that markedly shake a person's life, have lasted a long time or threaten their safety, self-help work can only be an addition alongside a specialist's support.

Self-Therapy Methods: What Can Help?

Many of the methods you can apply on your own are structured exercises also used in therapy. Some of the most frequently recommended are:

• Thought record: A table in which you write down a moment that shook you, the thought that went through your mind at that moment, the emotion you felt, and the evidence that supports and does not support that thought. Over time you start to catch your automatic thoughts more easily. You can find details of how this method is applied in the article on the thought record.
• Behavioural activation: Adding small, planned activities to your day that do you good or give you a sense of achievement, in order to break the "I don't feel like it, so I won't" cycle during low periods. It rests on the idea that motivation comes after action.
• Graded approach: For mild fears and avoidance, ranking the feared situation from easiest to hardest and trying to stay at each step until the anxiety eases.
• Relaxation and breathing exercises: Slow, regular breathing, muscle relaxation exercises and body scans can help reduce tension.
• Expressive writing: Writing freely about your feelings and thoughts concerning a difficult experience over several days, without intending to show it to anyone.
• Mindfulness practice: The practice of bringing your attention to the present moment without judgement. It can be restful for a mind that constantly drifts into the past or the future.
• Regulating sleep and daily rhythm: Regular sleeping and waking times, daylight, movement and reducing screen use before bed have a greater effect on mood than people imagine.

Let's imagine someone preparing for the KPSS (Turkey's public sector staff selection exam) who, after every practice test, is gripped by the thought "I just can't do this, I'll never get appointed" and cannot sit back down at the desk for the rest of the day. In the thought record they keep for a week, they notice that this thought comes especially when their maths scores drop, whereas their overall score has actually risen over the last three practice tests. The thought does not disappear completely, but they no longer believe it as much as before and are able to return to studying the next day. This is exactly where self-help work proves most useful: a specific, observable cycle that the person can work on by themselves.

Most of the techniques you will apply on your own come from cognitive behavioural therapy. You can read about the basic logic of this approach in the article what is cognitive behavioural therapy.

Books, Apps and AI: How to Choose?

Self-help resources are extremely varied, and their quality varies just as much. When choosing, the following questions can guide you:

For books:

• Is the author a mental health professional trained in this field?
• Is the book based on an evidence-based approach, such as cognitive behavioural therapy?
• Does it only explain, or does it also include exercises, forms and practical steps?
• Is the language exaggerated? Promises such as "Change your life in seven days" are generally not a good sign.

For apps:

• How is your data stored, and who is it shared with? Records about your mood are sensitive information.
• Who prepared the app's content?
• Does it constantly pressure you to switch to a paid subscription?
• As you use it, do you feel better, or more uneasy?

For social media and AI: Content shared in short videos, of the "five signs you have trauma" variety, can raise awareness, but it can easily lead you to diagnose yourself. AI chat tools can help you regulate your emotions or see a thought from different angles; however, they do not know you, they cannot always assess moments of crisis correctly, and they carry uncertainties about privacy. We covered this subject in more detail in the article on AI and therapy.

The Limits of Working on Your Own

Acknowledging the value of self-help work should not stop us from seeing its limits. The most common pitfalls are:

• Blind spots: It is hard to see your own thought patterns from inside them. Something you have been saying "That's just how I am" about for years may actually be a changeable habit; but noticing this often takes an outside eye.
• Avoidance: When you write your own programme, it is very easy to skip the hardest steps without realising it. When working with anxiety, the most feared step is usually the most healing one.
• Analysis turning into rumination: Trying to understand yourself can, beyond a certain point, turn into going round and round the same questions. Reading and thinking take the place of doing.
• Diagnosing yourself: It is natural to find something of yourself in every list you read. But a diagnosis is made by assessing the duration and severity of symptoms and their impact on your life together.
• Self-blame: Saying "I can't even do this" when an exercise does not work can feed an existing sense of worthlessness. Yet sometimes the problem lies not in the person but in the method not being suitable for that person or that problem.
• Severe and complex situations: Conditions such as trauma, severe depression, eating disorders, addiction and self-harm are not suitable for work carried out on your own.

Trying to help yourself is a sign of strength; but recognising a burden you cannot carry alone and asking for help is at least as strong a step.

A Six-Week Plan for Getting Started on Your Own

If you want to try self-help work, following a short, structured plan rather than wandering between random resources will make things easier. The suggestion below offers a framework for people experiencing mild stress, anxiety or lack of motivation:

1. Week one, observation: Without trying to change anything, each evening write a few lines about the hardest moment of the day, what you were thinking at that moment and what you felt. Also note your sleeping times.
2. Week two, rhythm: Try to fix your bedtime and waking time. Go outside at least once a day for a short walk.
3. Week three, activity: Make a list of small activities you used to enjoy or that give you a sense of achievement, and plan at least one of them every day. Sending a message to a friend, watering the pots on the balcony or reading ten pages of a book you left unfinished is enough.
4. Week four, thoughts: Find the recurring thoughts in your notes from the first week and keep a thought record for one of them.
5. Week five, approach: Break a situation you have been putting off or avoiding for a long time into its smallest step, and take that step.
6. Week six, review: Compare your notes from the beginning with today. What has changed, and what has stayed the same?

If you see no change at the end of six weeks, or if you feel worse, this is not a failure but a sign that you need a different kind of support.

When Should You Seek Professional Support?

Working on your own is not a suitable starting point in every situation. It is advisable to turn to a mental health specialist in the following situations:

• If your symptoms have lasted longer than two weeks and are markedly affecting your work, studies or relationships,
• If the methods you have tried on your own stopped working after a while or never worked at all,
• If a distressing experience from the past keeps coming back to your mind, or you are having nightmares or sudden startle reactions,
• If your relationship with alcohol, substances, gambling or food has started to slip out of your control,
• If you are having thoughts of harming yourself or ending your life.

The last point is especially important: if you have such thoughts, self-help work is not enough. Let someone close to you know, turn to a mental health specialist, and in an emergency call 112 (emergency services) without delay.

If access or budget is getting in the way

Many people turn to self-help work because they think it is hard to reach a psychologist. Yet there may be more options than they imagine. It may be possible to see a psychologist at the psychiatry outpatient clinics of state hospitals. University students can use their institution's psychological counselling units. Some municipalities and non-governmental organisations also offer counselling services. If you live in a small district or cannot attend sessions because of long working hours, online sessions can also be considered as an option. Do not hesitate to discuss fees openly at the first meeting; it is often possible to adjust the frequency of sessions to your needs.

You can find information about the psychotherapy process with adults on the individual therapy page.

How Is Self-Help Work Viewed in Therapy?

The work you do on your own does not go to waste when you start therapy; on the contrary, it creates a good starting point. The notes you have kept, the methods you have tried and how they felt to you help the therapist get to know you more quickly.

In cognitive behavioural therapy, work between sessions, that is homework, is an integral part of the process. The skills learnt in a one-hour weekly session become lasting habits by being tried out in daily life. Seen from this angle, therapy is not an alternative to self-help work but a framework that guides and deepens it. The therapist helps you choose which exercise suits you, examine together the points where you get stuck and notice the steps you are avoiding.

Towards the end of therapy, the aim is for the person to learn to become their own therapist. Recognising early signs of relapse, knowing which skills to turn to during difficult periods and not hesitating to ask for support again when needed are among the most important gains of the post-therapy period.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does reading self-help books before starting therapy affect the process negatively?

Generally not. What you read can give you a vocabulary and some concepts. Just take care not to give yourself a firm diagnosis based solely on what you have read, and share these things openly in therapy.

What should I do if I start to feel worse while working on my own?

Some exercises, such as writing about a difficult memory, can create a short-lived emotional intensity. If this intensity does not ease within a few days or keeps increasing, take a break from the exercise and talk to a specialist.

Can I carry on by myself after therapy ends?

Yes, this is one of the goals of therapy. Continuing to practise the skills you learnt in therapy regularly helps you hold on to your gains. It is also possible to have a few booster sessions during a period when you are struggling.

• #self-help
• #cognitive behavioural therapy
• #thought record
• #mental health apps

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Eda Erkan Alapala

Klinik Psikolog. İstanbul Kent Üniversitesi Klinik Psikoloji Tezli Yüksek Lisans mezunu; bilişsel davranışçı terapi, çocuk merkezli oyun terapisi ve çocuk-ergen psikoterapisi alanlarında eğitimlerini tamamlamıştır.

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