Turks Living in the UK: Adjustment and Mental Health

What do Turks in the UK go through while adjusting? Practical tips for loneliness, work pace, identity and family pressure, plus native-language online therapy.

You might be working in an office in London, in a restaurant in Manchester, or in a university laboratory in a small English town. Perhaps you came years ago with your family, perhaps you were born here, perhaps you set out within the last few years for a new job or for study. Turks in the UK come from very different stories, but many share one experience: inside a life that looks "fine" from the outside, there are times of tiredness, loneliness and the question "Where exactly do I belong?" In this article we will look at the possible effects of living in the UK on mental health, the difficulties that often appear during adjustment, and the concrete steps you can take to look after yourself.

What Do Turks in the UK Go Through While Adjusting?

Migration is not a single moment; it is an adjustment process that stretches over years. In the first months, positive experiences such as the excitement of a new city, regular public transport and meeting people from different cultures may be in the foreground. Over time, the realities of everyday life become clearer: rent, transport and bills, long working hours, winter evenings that grow dark early, and religious holidays spent far from family.

Some experiences specific to the UK can also affect adjustment:

• An indirect communication style: In British culture, criticism or objection is often softened and expressed through hints. For someone used to the more direct and warm communication of Turkish culture, the question "What did this person really mean?" can be tiring.
• Distant social relationships: Getting on well with colleagues does not necessarily mean being close friends with them. Habits such as invitations to visit, dropping in unannounced and having tea with a neighbour may be seen less often here.
• Weather and daylight: Long, grey winter months can contribute to a drop in energy and mood, especially for people coming from a sunny city.
• Multicultural but fragmented cities: In big cities it can be possible to find neighbourhoods, shops and cafés where Turkish is spoken. On the one hand this provides familiarity and trust; on the other, some people may feel caught "between two worlds".

None of these experiences is a problem on its own. But when they build up and become heavy, they can leave a person feeling worn out and alone. For more on the general stages of adjustment, you can look at our article describing the stages of adjustment after migration.

Signs That Your Mental Health Is Struggling Abroad

Difficulties experienced abroad are not always noticed through the words "I'm sad" or "I'm anxious". They often show themselves in the body, in sleep and in relationships. It can be useful to watch for the following signs:

• A lack of motivation lasting for weeks, and difficulty getting up in the mornings
• No longer enjoying things you used to enjoy
• Difficulty falling asleep, or on the contrary sleeping too much
• An intense feeling of emptiness or guilt after speaking with family in Turkey
• Avoiding seeing people, spending weekends alone at home
• Physical complaints such as frequent headaches, stomach problems and muscle tension
• Constantly thinking you "fall short" at work or at school
• Outbursts of anger, impatience with your spouse or children
• Trying to suppress feelings with alcohol, food, screens or shopping

These signs alone do not mean a diagnosis. But if they have continued for a few weeks and are making your daily life harder, it is important to take this seriously and look a little more closely at yourself. Our article on the symptoms of depression may guide you for general information about depression.

Why Might Turks in the UK Struggle? Cultural Context and Generational Differences

Turks in the UK are not one uniform community. Different waves of migration bring different living conditions and different difficulties.

Families who came many years ago have often lived a life shaped by hard working conditions, difficulty learning the language and sacrifices made so that "our children can be comfortable". In this generation, talking about feelings, asking for help or seeing a psychologist can be perceived as "weakness".

The second and third generations, born and raised in the UK, try to build an identity between two cultures. Turkish is spoken at home and English at school; the values at home and those of the friendship circle can differ. This is a richness, but at times also a source of inner conflict. We cover this subject in detail in our article on second-generation Turks.

Professionals and students who have come in recent years usually set out with high expectations. Career pressure, anxiety about professional competence, having to perform in a new language, and the family, friends and social status left behind are common sources of stress in this group.

There are no firm boundaries between these groups; a person can be both second generation and a professional who has moved to a new city. What matters is being able to see which burdens your own story carries. Sometimes the problem comes not from a single big event but from small tiredness accumulated over the years.

In addition to these, there are some shared factors:

• Uncertainty: Uncertainty about a residence permit, a work contract or where you will live in future can keep the mind constantly "on alert".
• Experiences of discrimination: Small or large experiences of exclusion because of accent, name or appearance can lead a person to feel worthless or unsafe. These experiences are not a personal weakness but a real source of stress.
• Family expectations: The expectation of giving financial or emotional support to family in Turkey can increase the pressure of "I have to succeed".
• Shame and embarrassment: The worry of "What will people say?" can delay admitting that you are struggling and asking for help.

Effects on Family, Relationships and Children

The burden of life abroad does not stay only on the individual's shoulders; it also reflects on relationships within the family. While one spouse adapts to work and social life more quickly, the other may be left at home alone with a language barrier and loneliness. Over time this imbalance can turn into resentment and "you don't understand me" arguments.

Children grow up with British culture at school and Turkish culture at home. While parents often carry worries such as "Will my child forget Turkish?" and "Will they lose our values?", children may be gripped by a feeling of "my family doesn't understand me". In adolescence this tension can become even more marked.

Imagine a fifteen-year-old who wants to go out in the evening with school friends, while their parents do not find this safe and say, "That doesn't happen in our culture." The young person may feel restricted, and the parents helpless with the fear of losing their child. Disagreements like this are often fed not by a lack of love but by two different fears: the parents' worry about safety and the young person's worry about being left out. In such situations, rather than who is right, what matters is that the feelings of both sides are heard and common ground is found. For support options for teenagers, you can look at the adolescent counselling page.

What You Can Do on Your Own: Practical Steps

You do not need big changes to protect your mental health abroad. Small but regular steps can make a difference over time:

1. Use daylight deliberately. In the winter months, go outside at lunchtime, even briefly. Open the curtains in the morning and, if possible, put your desk by a window.
2. Make a weekly "connection plan". Aim to meet at least one person face to face every week: a neighbour, a colleague or someone from a Turkish association. Closeness builds over time through repeated small contacts.
3. Put your link with Turkey on a rhythm. Tie conversations with family to particular days and times. That way the bond is kept while the pressure of constantly "being reachable" is reduced.
4. Write down your feelings. Set aside five minutes in the evening to note the moment of the day that was hardest for you and what you were thinking at that moment. This simple habit can help you notice your automatic thoughts.
5. Move your body. Walks in parks, cycling or short exercises at home can have a positive effect on mood. A half-hour walk a few times a week is a good start.
6. Watch out for "all or nothing" thinking. Thoughts such as "I will never be happy here" or "If I go back to Turkey everything will be fixed" are understandable but often paint the picture in a single colour. Ask yourself, "What would the middle ground look like?"
7. Create small rituals. A Sunday breakfast, a holiday table, a Turkish series or a music playlist you love; familiar rituals can strengthen a sense of belonging.
8. Find out about local sources of support. Knowing in advance how your GP, local helplines and emergency services work gives you confidence in a difficult moment.

Struggling while living abroad does not mean you have failed to adjust; it can be a natural part of a big change.

When Should You Seek Professional Support?

If one or more of the following apply to you, you may want to consider speaking with a mental health professional:

• If the symptoms have continued for more than two weeks and are not easing
• If going to work, caring for children or doing basic household tasks is becoming harder
• If there are marked changes in your sleep and appetite
• If you often have crying fits, intense anger or panic attacks
• If you have started to suppress your feelings with alcohol or other substances
• If your relationships with your spouse or children have become seriously strained

If you are having thoughts of harming yourself or ending your life, do not wait. In the UK, in an emergency you can call 999 or 112; you can also go to the nearest emergency department. Online therapy is not an emergency intervention service. In situations of serious risk, emergency departments and psychiatric services where you live are necessary.

The public health system and local mental health services in the country where you live are an important resource. Getting support in your native language does not have to replace these services; it is an option that can be used alongside them.

How Does Work in Online Therapy in Your Native Language Go?

Many people use English comfortably at work, but when it comes to feelings, childhood memories or family relationships, words can become difficult. Being able to say things like "My mother never praised me, so that no one would put the evil eye on me" or "Not going to kiss the elders' hands at the religious holiday would have been seen as shameful" without having to explain them can make the therapeutic relationship easier for some clients. This may not apply to every client, but it is important to know your options.

Work in online therapy in your native language usually goes like this:

• First meetings: The difficulties you are going through, your migration story, your family structure and your goals are discussed. A working plan is drawn up together.
• Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) techniques: Work is done on noticing the automatic thoughts that go through your mind in difficult situations (such as "I will never be accepted here"), reviewing the evidence for them and developing more balanced perspectives.
• Behavioural steps: Concrete goals are set, such as increasing social contact, planning enjoyable activities and improving sleep routines.
• Addressing the cultural context: Family expectations, feelings of guilt and the experience of identity between two cultures can be talked through.
• Couple or family-focused work when needed: For tensions between spouses abroad, couple sessions can also be an option.

From a practical point of view, the time difference between the UK and Turkey is usually a few hours and can vary through the year with daylight saving time. So when planning sessions, it is important to confirm the time on both sides. A quiet and private room, headphones and a secure internet connection increase the effectiveness of the session. Payment can be made online; pricing is in TL and payment with an international card is possible. As for insurance reimbursement, you need to check the terms of your own insurance company. For more information you can take a look at the online therapy and Turks living abroad pages.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does therapy in Turkish really make a difference for Turks in the UK?

This varies from person to person. Some clients say they can express their feelings more easily in their native language and feel understood without having to explain the cultural context. Others can also get a lot out of therapy in English. What matters is choosing the setting where you feel most comfortable.

Can I use psychological support from the local health system together with online therapy in Turkish?

Generally yes, but it is recommended that you share this openly with both professionals. That way the work complements each other and conflicting guidance is avoided. If medication is needed, this assessment should be made by a psychiatrist where you live.

Does the time difference make the session schedule harder?

The time difference between the UK and Turkey is relatively small, and a time that suits both sides can usually be found. It helps to remember that the difference may change when the clocks change, and to note the appointment time in the times of both countries.

Will admitting that I'm struggling upset my family?

Some families may find this hard to understand at first. But looking after yourself can also mean a healthier relationship for your family. You decide whom you share the fact that you have started therapy with, when, and how much.

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• #therapy in Turkish
• #online therapy

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Eda Erkan Alapala

Klinik Psikolog. İstanbul Kent Üniversitesi Klinik Psikoloji Tezli Yüksek Lisans mezunu; bilişsel davranışçı terapi, çocuk merkezli oyun terapisi ve çocuk-ergen psikoterapisi alanlarında eğitimlerini tamamlamıştır.

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