Is LGS stress weighing on your Year 8 child? The signs, the hidden sources that raise stress and practical suggestions for families to ease the load at home.
There are ten minutes until the school bus arrives. The child is at the breakfast table, pushing the cheese on their plate from one side to the other, and says "My tummy hurts." They said it yesterday too, and last week. You went to the doctor, and nothing was found. In the evening, the same child can't put the phone down before the mock exam results are announced, and when the result arrives they quietly retreat to their room. LGS stress often looks like this: a 13-year-old expressing through their body and behaviour a weight they cannot put into words. The LGS is Turkey's national high-school entrance exam, and in this article we discuss how you can recognise the stress a Year 8 child is experiencing, what unknowingly increases it, and what you can do at home to ease the load.
LGS Stress: Why Is This Load So Heavy at This Age?
The central exam within the Transition to High School System (Liselere Geçiş Sistemi) is the first big, national-scale exam many children face in their lives. It falls in a developmentally sensitive period. A child in Year 8 is right in the middle of adolescence: their body is changing rapidly, their emotions are intensifying, friendships are becoming more important than ever, and their view of themselves has not yet settled.
At this age children are only just developing abstract and long-term thinking. Carrying a big, abstract load such as "This exam will affect my four years of high school, and from there university and my career" is hard even for an adult, and far heavier for a child. On top of that, this load often becomes the agenda of the whole family, not just the child.
Moreover, Year 8 is not only an exam year but also a year of farewells. The child knows they will be leaving the friends they have been with for four years, the teachers they are used to and the familiar school building. The exam result also determines how this parting will happen, including whether they will go to the same school as their best friend. That is why exam anxiety often contains a quiet separation anxiety as well. In some children this anxiety shows up as clinging more tightly to friends as the exam approaches or, conversely, drawing away from them as if preparing for the separation.
In short, LGS stress arises not from the child being "weak" but from the collision between the characteristics of this developmental stage and the meaning the exam carries. Knowing this makes it easier to respond to the child's reactions with more understanding.
Signs of LGS Stress: What Is Your Child Telling You?
Children aged 13 or 14 rarely express stress by saying "I'm stressed." Instead, stress shows itself in the body, in behaviour and in relationships.
Signs in the body
- Recurring stomach aches, nausea or headaches, especially in the morning or before exams
- Difficulty falling asleep, waking frequently at night, or being unable to get up in the morning
- A marked decrease or increase in appetite
- An increase in habits such as nail biting, lip chewing or hair pulling
Signs in emotions and behaviour
- Frequent crying, overreacting to small things
- Drifting away from games they used to play and activities they used to enjoy
- Fighting with siblings more often than usual
- Self-deprecating remarks such as "I'm stupid anyway" or "I can't do anything right"
- Excessive restlessness before mock exam results, withdrawal afterwards
- Avoiding studying or, conversely, sitting at the desk for hours without ever taking a break
With recurring physical complaints, an assessment by a doctor comes first. When no physical cause is found, it is worth considering that these symptoms may be one of the ways stress speaks. Our article on exam anxiety, which looks in detail at anxiety symptoms specific to exams, may also offer guidance on this.
Hidden Sources That Increase Stress
Families often believe they are not putting pressure on their child, and they are largely right; nobody wants to burden their child deliberately. However, stress is fed less by open pressure than by the small details of everyday life.
The household agenda getting locked onto the exam: If, at dinner, in the car and in phone calls, the subject keeps coming back to the exam, the child cannot get away from it for even a moment.
The echo of parents' groups: Mock exam results, course recommendations and messages such as "Ours solved this many questions this week" shared in the class parents' messaging group raise parents' anxiety. That anxiety, in turn, passes to the child without anyone noticing.
Promises of rewards and punishments: Sentences such as "If you get into the science high school, we'll buy you a phone" or "If you don't pass, there's no summer holiday", though said to motivate, increase the weight on the exam. The child begins to see the exam not just as a matter of school but as an event that will decide a reward or a punishment.
Childhood being put on hold: The approach "No games this year; you can play after the exam" takes away a 13-year-old's most basic way of resting and relaxing. For a child of this age, play is not a luxury but a need.
The language of teachers and others: The sentence "This is the most important year of your life" is repeated often at school, at the tutoring course and on visits to relatives. Well-meant as it is, it can turn the exam into a matter of life and death in the child's mind.
Comparison with siblings or others: An older brother's or cousin's success last year loads more onto the child's shoulders than their own burden.
Let's say a mother reads in the parents' group one evening that another pupil made very few mistakes in a mock exam. Without saying anything, she goes into the room and asks "How many tests did you do today?" The mother thinks she simply wants information; but the child immediately senses the tension behind the question from the tone of her voice and her frown. A large part of stress is passed on through wordless channels like this.
Ways of Easing the Load at Home
It is neither possible nor necessary to remove stress entirely; a reasonable level of stress helps a child get moving. The aim is to stop the stress from crushing the child.
Stop the exam being the only topic at home
Set aside periods when the exam is not discussed at home. For example, evening meals can be a time for conversation unrelated to the exam. Asking about the child's day, their friends and the things that interest them reminds them that they are more than an exam.
Make room for play and hobbies
Rather than banning a game, sport or hobby the child loves altogether, make room for it within the timetable. A few hours a week of basketball, drawing, music or meeting friends can noticeably reduce the child's stress level.
Separate rewards and punishments from the exam result
Focus on effort and process, not on the result. Saying "You really stuck to your plan this week, and I'm proud of that" is a far healthier source of motivation than a score-dependent reward.
Keep your own anxiety separate from your child
Notice how what you read in parents' groups and what other families tell you affects you. If necessary, turn off notifications for these groups. Talking about your own anxiety with your partner, a relative or a specialist allows you to approach your child more calmly.
Help the body settle
Regular sleep, half an hour without screens before bed, a short evening walk and simple breathing exercises reduce the tension in the child's body. For example, breathing in together while counting to four and breathing out while counting to six before bed can make it easier to fall asleep.
Build the study plan together with your child
Children of this age may struggle to follow a timetable handed to them ready-made; but when they take part in preparing the plan, they take more ownership of it. Talk with your child about which subject they will study on which day, how they would like to take breaks and at what times they feel most alert. Having free time written clearly into the plan, alongside school, courses and homework, gives the child the message "Rest is part of the plan too." When the plan doesn't work out, asking "Which part was hard, and how shall we change it?" rather than blaming helps the child get to know their own way of studying.
Stay in touch with the school
The form teacher and the school's guidance service see your child's mood and behaviour at school from a different angle from yours. Sharing the changes you notice at home with them and asking what has been observed at school allows you to understand the child's needs more fully. Some schools also organise guidance activities for the exam period; it can be useful to know about these.
Create a setting where they can talk about feelings
When your child voices their anxiety, saying "There's nothing to be afraid of" or "You'll be fine", however well-meant, brushes the feeling aside. Saying instead "This exam is really frightening you, isn't it? Can you tell me a bit about it?" makes the child feel their emotion has been accepted.
How Should You Talk to Your Child About the LGS?
Talking about the exam is healthier than never mentioning it; what matters is how you talk about it.
Make room for the question "What if I don't pass?" Children often don't ask this question out loud, but they carry it in their minds constantly. Asking at a calm moment "Let's say you didn't get into the school you wanted. What do you think would happen?" allows the child to talk about the worst-case scenario. Thinking together "What other schools are there, and what could you do there?" turns a disaster scenario into a realistic plan.
Say clearly that your love is unconditional. Children may secretly fear that the exam result will affect their family's love for them. Hearing clearly "Whatever the result, we love you and we're proud of you" reduces this fear.
Talk about your own experiences. Telling them about a time you too struggled in an exam and didn't get what you expected but found your way shows the child concretely that life is not decided by a single exam.
The score your child gets in the LGS does not describe who they are. But how they get through this year teaches them something important about how they will cope with difficulties in the future.
Our article the LGS result was disappointing, about how to support a child if the result is not what was hoped for, can also be read in advance.
When Should You Seek Professional Support?
Getting support from a specialist is helpful in the following situations:
- Physical complaints persist despite a doctor's assessment and prevent the child from going to school
- Sleep and appetite problems have continued for weeks
- The child cries often, constantly belittles themselves or seems hopeless
- They have panic-attack-like episodes before exams or mock exams
- They have withdrawn completely from friends and activities they love
- The subject of the exam constantly leads to rows at home
If your child talks about harming themselves or wanting to die, never brush these words aside, do not leave them alone, and in an emergency call 112 (emergency services) without delay.
How Is LGS Anxiety Addressed in Therapy?
In therapy with a Year 8 child, it is important to work both with the child and with the family. Within adolescent counselling, the following approaches can be used:
Recognising and naming anxiety: The child learns to notice how anxiety feels in their body, in which situations it rises and which thoughts feed it. When working with children of this age, concrete tools such as drawings and an anxiety thermometer are often used.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy techniques: Thoughts such as "If I don't pass, my family won't love me" or "If I get even one question wrong, everything's over" are identified and balanced with more realistic thoughts.
Coping skills: Breathing exercises, muscle relaxation exercises and short techniques to help the child focus their attention during the exam are taught and practised together.
Family sessions: With parents, the work focuses on the atmosphere at home, balancing expectations and how to accompany the child's emotions. The family managing its own anxiety is an important factor in reducing the child's anxiety. Where needed, how siblings are affected by the process is also discussed; when the household's attention turns to one child in the exam year, the other children may feel pushed into the background.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does my child have to take the LGS?
Taking the central exam is optional; placement in schools other than those that admit students by exam is done through a different system. It is important to find out the current rules from your school's guidance service. However, it is healthier to make this decision not merely to avoid stress but by considering the child's interests and goals together.
Is it right to promise a reward if they pass?
Big rewards tied to the result can increase the pressure on the exam. Planning a small celebration that will happen whatever the result, or appreciating the effort the child shows throughout the process, is a more supportive approach.
Can a morning stomach ache really be psychological?
Stress can create real symptoms in the body; the child is not pretending but genuinely feels the pain. Even so, physical causes should first be assessed by a doctor. If no physical cause is found, addressing the stress can help reduce the complaints.
My child doesn't seem stressed at all. Don't they care about the exam?
Not every child shows stress in the same way. Some children cover their anxiety with indifference or jokes, while others genuinely have a more relaxed temperament. Opening a pressure-free conversation about the exam with your child helps you understand what they are feeling.
Bu yazı genel bilgilendirme amaçlıdır; tanı veya tedavi yerine geçmez. Yaşadığınız güçlükler için bir ruh sağlığı uzmanına başvurmanız önerilir. Acil bir durumda lütfen 112'yi arayın.
Eda Erkan Alapala
Klinik Psikolog. İstanbul Kent Üniversitesi Klinik Psikoloji Tezli Yüksek Lisans mezunu; bilişsel davranışçı terapi, çocuk merkezli oyun terapisi ve çocuk-ergen psikoterapisi alanlarında eğitimlerini tamamlamıştır.
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