Placed on a Degree You Didn't Want: Study It or Retake the Exam?

Placed on a degree you didn't want and unsure what to do? We look at the emotions, the options and family pressure when choosing between studying and retaking.

When the results page opens, a programme name appears, and in that moment a year or more of effort takes concrete form. But for some young people that name is not a joy but a question mark: "Did I really put this down? Am I actually going to study this?" A degree added near the bottom of the preference list "so it wouldn't be left empty", a programme written down because the family insisted, or a field chosen because the score was enough but never really considered, suddenly becomes the name of the next four years. This period, in which young people or their families ask "they've been placed on a degree they didn't want, what do we do now?", demands a big decision in a short time, under the pressure of registration deadlines. In this article we look at the psychology of this indecision, at questions that can help when weighing up the options, and at the family's role in the process. We cannot give you the right answer; but we can help the decision be made with less anxiety and more information.

Placed on a Degree You Didn't Want: Why Is It Such a Hard Decision?

At first glance the options look simple: either register and study, or prepare for another year. Yet each of these two options carries much bigger meanings in the young person's mind.

For some young people, choosing to study means "giving up" or "abandoning their dreams". Choosing to prepare again, on the other hand, brings with it the fear of "losing a year", "falling behind friends" and "what if it goes even worse next time?" Both paths have a cost, and because the young person doesn't know which of these costs they can bear, they freeze.

This freezing has several psychological sources:

• Loss aversion: People tend to focus more on the pain of losing something than on the joy of gaining something. When both options involve a loss, making a decision can become paralysing.
• Fear of regret: The thought "What if I choose wrong and regret it for the rest of my life?" makes the decision seem far more irreversible than it is.
• Uncertainty about identity: An eighteen-year-old may not yet fully know what they want or in which work they will be happy. This uncertainty is natural, but it makes the decision harder.
• The volume of outside voices: Family, relatives, prep-centre teachers, friends and social media give contradictory advice. The young person's own voice can get lost in this crowd.

We discuss the general mechanisms of indecision in more detail in our article on indecisiveness.

What Lies Beneath the Feeling of "I Don't Want This"?

Before making a decision, it is necessary to unpack the sentence "I don't want this degree". It can mean very different things for different young people:

• Not knowing the degree itself: The young person may know only the name of the degree and a few preconceptions about it. The modules, where graduates work and how the department looks from the inside may never have been researched.
• The voice of disappointment: Because the degree they really wanted was out of reach, the degree they got may be rejected whatever it is. In this case the problem is not the degree but a dream that has not yet been grieved.
• Status anxiety: How the degree is perceived in society may matter more than the young person's own interest. The question "What will people say?" overtakes the question "What do I want?"
• A genuine mismatch: The young person may really know the content of the degree and see that it clearly does not fit their interests, abilities and values.
• City and living conditions: Sometimes what is unwanted is not the degree but the city where the university is, being far from family, or the conditions in student halls.

Making this distinction changes the nature of the decision. For example, a "no" given in the voice of disappointment may give way to indecision or acceptance after a few weeks. A genuine mismatch, on the other hand, tends to grow over time.

Let's say a young person aiming for medical school gets a place on the biology degree that they put in the middle of their list because their score wasn't high enough. Their first reaction is a flat refusal: "I'm not studying this." A week later, while looking at the course content and the fields where graduates work, they notice that the laboratory work interests them. But they are still not ready to let go of the dream of "becoming a doctor". What this young person needs to do before deciding is not to choose one of the two, but first to tell apart which feeling is feeding which thought.

Placed on a Degree You Didn't Want: Weighing Up the Options Realistically

Rather than deciding in a panic, it is necessary to weigh the options with concrete information. Some practical steps for this are:

Gather information

• Look at the degree's curriculum and the content of the first two years.
• If possible, talk to someone studying on that degree or who has graduated from it.
• Research the university's conditions for horizontal transfer, double major and minor programmes. These options depend on different conditions according to each university's own regulations.
• If you are thinking of sitting the exam again, check the current ÖSYM guide (Turkey's assessment and placement centre) to see whether having been placed on a programme the previous year affects the following year's score calculation.

Prepare a decision table

Divide a sheet of paper in two: write "study" on one side and "prepare again" on the other. For each, note the possible gains, the costs and the thing that frightens you most. Then, next to each item, give a score showing how important it is to you. This table will not make the decision for you; but it makes the blurry thoughts spinning in your mind visible and comparable.

Take the psychological cost of preparing again into account

Preparing for another year is not only an academic process but an emotional one. Staying at home while friends start university, a shrinking social life, the anxiety of "what if it doesn't work this time either" and the family's expectations can make this year hard. Assess honestly whether you are in a position to take on this cost. If the burnout or intense anxiety you experienced while preparing last year is still fresh, this is something that needs separate consideration.

If you decide to prepare again, take care not to set up this year as a waiting room where you do nothing but study. Sport, volunteering, a part-time job or regular meet-ups with friends on certain days of the week both maintain a daily rhythm and ease the feeling that "my life has stopped". Write down your goal not just as a programme name but together with why you want that programme; on hard days, it is often this "why" that brings you back to the desk.

Separate the decision from the registration rush

Registration dates usually come shortly after results are announced, and this short time can lead to making the decision in a frantic scramble. Set yourself a specific decision day, and until then set aside a short time each day to think about it; for the rest of the day, try not to keep turning the decision over in your mind. Conclusions reached at night, when you are tired and anxious, usually don't seem as weighty in the morning. Protecting your sleep, your meals and your contact with the people who comfort you while making an important decision also protects the quality of the decision.

Create a space where you can hear your own voice

During this period, friends' "I got in" posts on social media, score talk in class group chats and phone calls from relatives follow one after another. Each of them adds someone else's yardstick to your decision. Turning down some of these voices for a few days, for example by switching off notifications and talking only to one or two people you trust, makes it easier to hear what you yourself want. You can ask yourself: "If nobody were ever going to know what I chose, which option would I feel closer to?"

Remember that choosing to study is also a process

Choosing to study does not mean you have to love the degree. Some young people use the first year as a period of exploration, find an interesting area within the modules, or use the skills the degree provides in an entirely different field. Changing direction while studying is also possible. Many young people who start a degree they didn't want find, at the end of the first year, an opportunity to reassess their decision, this time with far more information.

Thinking of this decision not as a single move that will determine your whole life, but as choosing your next step, makes the load bearable.

Family Pressure and Choosing a Degree in Turkey

In Turkey, choosing a university is rarely the young person's decision alone. Parents, shaped by their own life experience and economic worries, see certain degrees as "professions with a job waiting at the end", which can push the young person's interests into second place. When the high cost of living and youth unemployment are being discussed, the idea that "they should study something that will get them a job" grows even stronger.

In some families the opposite happens: the young person is willing to study, but the family insists that they prepare again, saying "this degree isn't good enough for our child". In both cases, the young person's own voice can be drowned out by the family's anxiety.

My suggestion to families is this: share your own view honestly, but don't make the decision in the young person's place. Saying "This is what we think, because this is what we're worried about; but this is your life and we want to support your decision" allows the young person both to hear their family's view and to own their decision. You can find a broader discussion of family expectations about careers in our article on family pressure over career choice.

After the decision

Even after the decision has been made, doubts may continue. This does not mean the decision was wrong; it is a natural side effect of big decisions. For the young person who chooses to study, the first term brings additional challenges such as adjusting to a new city, student halls and a new social circle. The suggestions in our article on adjusting to university may help make this period easier.

For the young person who chooses to prepare again, the hardest moments are usually September and October: staying at home while friends leave for their new cities can lead to questioning the decision. Knowing in advance that these feelings will come makes it easier not to read them as proof that the decision was wrong.

When Should You Seek Professional Support?

Indecision is to be expected during this period. However, it may be helpful to talk to a professional in the following situations:

• If the indecision lasts for weeks and the young person feels so stuck that they cannot carry on with daily life
• If there are marked disturbances in sleep, appetite and energy levels
• If the young person constantly blames themselves and struggles with thoughts such as "I've ruined everything"
• If the decision has turned into serious and ongoing conflict within the family
• If thoughts of self-harm or of ending their life are expressed

In the last case, support should be sought without delay; in an emergency, call 112 (emergency services). Remember that these signs alone do not amount to a diagnosis, but they may show that the young person needs support. For young people aged eighteen or over, this decision can be explored in individual therapy within the framework of the young person's own values and goals.

How Is Indecision About a Degree Addressed in Therapy?

The aim in therapy is not to tell the young person what to do, but to open up a mental space in which they can make their own decision. The process usually begins with the young person exploring the meanings and feelings they attach to this decision. Once feelings such as disappointment, shame, anger or fear are named, the decision itself starts to look clearer.

Within Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), thoughts such as "If I choose wrong, my life will be ruined" or "If I study this, I'll be admitting I'm a failure" are examined. How realistic these thoughts are, and what other possibilities exist, are questioned. Work on values is also important in this process: the young person reflects on what really matters in their life and evaluates their options in light of these values.

In some young people this decision triggers deeper patterns such as "either I must be perfect or I am a failure". Recognising these patterns helps the young person be more flexible and compassionate towards themselves, not only for this decision but for big choices in the future. When needed, the family is also involved in the process.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does it make sense to register and prepare for the exam again at the same time?

For some young people this route reduces anxiety because it offers a safety net. However, it is hard to be productive both at university and in exam preparation; one of the two usually suffers. Before choosing this route, think realistically about your time and energy plan and check the current exam rules.

Can a liking for the degree develop over time?

Yes, for some young people this is possible. A liking for a field often develops as you come into contact with it, have experiences of success and find a place for yourself within it. But it is not a requirement; if interest does not develop, horizontal transfer, a double major or different directions after graduation are still possible.

My family wants me to study it but I don't; what should I do?

First clarify your own reasons and explain them openly to your family at a calm moment. Listen to your family's concerns too; these concerns are often fed by fears about your future. If the disagreement continues, a joint conversation or the help of a professional can help both sides feel understood.

• #university choices
• #after the YKS
• #decision-making
• #career choice

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Eda Erkan Alapala

Klinik Psikolog. İstanbul Kent Üniversitesi Klinik Psikoloji Tezli Yüksek Lisans mezunu; bilişsel davranışçı terapi, çocuk merkezli oyun terapisi ve çocuk-ergen psikoterapisi alanlarında eğitimlerini tamamlamıştır.

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